By Just Inspire
It’s the day after Father’s Day, and it’s raining. That feels symbolic—for the tears that fall, the emotions we try to swallow, the truths that resurface.
When I was younger, holidays were simple. Fun. A chance to celebrate. Now, they feel more like pressure: buy something, post something, send the same recycled messages. Go with the flow. But when you pause and look a little deeper, you realize holidays can bring pain, too.
While some of us stay on the surface of things, others take deeper dives in life—and the deeper you go, the more is revealed.
A year ago, I stood beside a dear friend—no, my brother—as he laid a parent to rest. I hated that feeling. The helplessness. The ache of witnessing pain you can’t take away. That loss stayed with me. That day reminded me why I do this work. Why at JustINSPIRE, I teach young men to master focus, to value time. Because every passing day is one we never get back. One less Monday. One less summer. One less fall to wear carefully layered fits that make you feel like art.
For some, Father’s Day is a celebration. For others, it’s a reminder of loss. And not just from death—some relationships die long before the people in them. That kind of grief… it lingers. It’s more complex. Because the hardest truth to accept is that while people are alive, healing is still possible. But ego, ignorance, and pride can make reconciliation feel impossible.
Let me be vulnerable—I carry a father wound.
And if you do too, know this: you’re not alone. And it’s okay to talk about it. I thank a phenomenal brother who supported me during my time at UNC Chapel Hill. Therapy helped me process, to face my thoughts and feelings head-on.
Father wounds come in many forms:
- Maybe your father wasn’t there—physically or emotionally.
- Maybe he was present but never met your expectations—or you never met his.
- Maybe you’re both carrying unhealed trauma that’s blocking the bond you both deserve.
We’re often taught these picture-perfect standards: white picket fences, a golden retriever, Sunday barbecues. But what if you grew up in a small apartment with a mutt and a single mom? That’s not less—it’s just different. Stop judging your pain by someone else’s fantasy.
My own father was harsh. He disciplined with a heavy hand. For a long time, I was socially awkward and afraid. But I fought through that. I’ve overcome challenges that would buckle a lesser man. So how can I call myself weak?
I also understand now—he did what he could with what he knew. His father may have been harder on him. He had his own limitations. And still, he gave me something I carry to this day: resilience. Direction. A deep love I’ve learned to see with clearer eyes.
So to anyone navigating difficult relationships—especially with your father—know this: all you can do is try. Real relationships aren’t proven by moments. They’re proven by time, patience, and effort. If you care, extend. If you’re hurt, heal. And if you’re alone today, I hope these words offer comfort.
Maybe this Father’s Day wasn’t great for you. That’s okay.
You are still here. And you are still worthy of love, healing, and peace.
Be wise. Be true.
Just Inspire.
P.S. Shoutout to my cousin Taylor Tee on the infographics. #Support
