September 2022. A date I won’t forget. That was when I made a move that, if I’m honest, I deeply regret. My own “Thanos snap” moment.
I left my townhouse in Chapel Hill, NC, leaving behind my role at Eno Valley Elementary – a school I loved, where I was connected not only to students but to their families. I relocated to Baltimore, MD under the assumption that I was stepping into a better school system, where I could affect change for even more students who looked like me.
I had dreams of being closer to family and friends. But looking back… this might have been the biggest misstep of my life.
I’m proud of what I’ve built with JustINSPIRE Mentoring LLC, but I know it would be moving at a more aggressive rate if I had launched it in North Carolina. I had an environment ready to support me, a school of 600 students to build from, and a community that believed in me. Getting those subscribers up would’ve been nothing.
At first, Baltimore felt like a win. I was making almost as much from one role as I did from two in NC. Cost of living went up, but the income seemed to match. Truth is, I’d still be at my original Baltimore City school if it hadn’t closed. I stayed despite the red flags, despite knowing things weren’t right. That’s probably why it closed. Still, I believed if JustINSPIRE had been fully up and running, I could’ve supported even more students.
What hurts is the isolation. In NC, I had partners, allies, friends in the work. Here, it’s been hard to find those long-standing connections beyond just sharing ideas. And this last year has left me down on the mat, on my back. I might be losing, but not because I’m not giving it my all. I just need a couple rolls of luck and favor.
What breaks my heart is I worked so hard to never need luck. I believed if I became a man of value, opportunity would come. I’ve led soldiers as an LT in the Army National Guard. I’ve served as a school counselor. I’ve built mentorship systems grounded in research and lived experience. I created my Gentleman Scholar mindset to pour into young men so they can thrive.
And yet, here I am, struggling to cover basics. Not because I lack ability, but because I haven’t been given a real opportunity. Some days, it feels like life isn’t fair. The strong are asked to carry the load, yet given so much less. I see funds handed to people just to exist, while those of us trying to build legacies for others go ignored.
It hurts. But I keep fighting. I know my day will come.
And if you’re reading this, holding onto a dream worth fighting for, know this:
Keep going. Your day will come too.
